It has been far too long since I’ve had a moment to myself to share a little bit about what has been going on with me in this life. Little blog, I’m sorry for neglecting you so much. 

But the truth is, I haven’t really made any time for myself over the last few months. I’ve been so drained with work, working on my relationship with Nigel, and just trying to fit some ‘me’ time in between all of that. With a schedule like mine, it’s tough a lot of the time to find time to sit and collect my thoughts. I’m learning that as an adult, these times are far and few in between, and that I’ve realized how vital it is for me to make time to write my thoughts down. I’m not sure how to begin this entry, as I haven’t written in so long, I’ve become rather rusty in my skill. But, here goes…

I’ve been working the same job for the last six years, and every single day has become such a drag for me. It’s an extremely tough time working in retail right now, and it’s only going to get harder. With every year our numbers grow, while the traffic isn’t what it used to be. I’m burnt out trying to appease my upper management with the unachievable goals and numbers that I’m responsible to do. I have to remind myself that I’m a salesperson that is selling lipstick and mascara, and that this job is not the make all, end all for me. I’ve become so comfortable with the routine of working there, that I’m in a position I never wanted to be in. It’s so important for me, more now than ever, to figure out what I truly want to be doing in this lifetime, because selling lipstick and mascara is not that. I’ve given myself a rather short, but doable timeline for me to get out. I need to work closer to home, and find a job that will allow me to continue and finish my education. Because if I don’t get on that soon, I find that every year my doors of opportunity are getting smaller, and smaller. I’m hoping before the year ends that I will have a steady game plan for my future, because the path that I’m on now, is not it. 

The other day I got together with some friends that I haven’t seen in awhile. To feel the love that a couple of them gave me, truly made me feel a glimmer of my old self, and how truly loved, understood, and appreciated I was. No matter how quirky, crazy, and sometimes mean I was. It was a nice reminder from the universe in a weird way, but I’ll take it.

Until next time.

Sincerely,

Jay.