I went on a date last week. It was the first serious date that I’ve been on since the break up. We spent four wonderful hours together, but as soon as it was over, I immediately started to think about my past. Am I being fair? Am I being fair to myself, or Jesse? Am I ready for this again? The thoughts kept creeping up to me, and it was a bit overwhelming. My emotional state has been extremely up and down these last few weeks. Still dealing with the repercussions of losing my best friend, and having the utmost insane anxiety about the Novel Coronavirus that nobody is talking about. It was just odd to go on a couple of dates with someone to ultimately not pursuing it because of the lack of ‘that’ feeling when you just know, and the inability of being in that mental state for that.

I’m going to try ‘dating’ a different way this time. I see dating completely different these days. Instead of trying to date the typical way, I’m seeking my best friend. My old friend Patrick once shared with me that, “the best of friends, make the best of lovers.”

Amen.

Sincerely,
Jay