I remember the night when we first met. I wasn’t suppose to be driving that way, but I took the chance and made the trip. I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I knew that I was nervous the entire time, but you made me feel comfortable. I don’t make good first impressions, ever, so when we hung out again, it was an honor. It was so great to just walk around your town with no destination in sight. We walked, and talked about everything. I knew their was more to you than your charming looks, you’re atypical from the rest, and that is something that I look for in someone. You and I have similar taste in music, which I found to be amazing. I’m not sure I’ve met someone else that has a similar musical collection as I. I love that you’re a bookwork with exquisite taste, and that is hard to come by. I knew that staying out there for so long was going to be a bad idea, but it was worth it. It was worth every minute getting to know you, and getting a tour of your town. I would’ve walked all night with you, if you wanted. I was almost positive you wouldn’t talk to me again after I had my little freak out moment, but you did, and I thank you for that. We started to hangout almost every weekend, I hadn’t let another guy so close into my life as I did with you. It made me so happy that you came to the beach with Kasey, Dev and I. I remember when you told me you might have a crush on me, and at that moment I wasn’t sure what to say, but I knew that I had developed a crush on you too. I’m not good at relationships, as I’ve never been in one, but with everyone that I’ve dated, I’m learning more about myself, and how to better deal with situations. I still felt insecure about you, but I decided to go with my gut and try to pursue you. You’re different from the rest, and I think thats why I became infatuated with you. When we talked that night on the lake, I really enjoyed hearing about your past. It’s so great to meet someone that has had so much struggle and pain in their life. You live, and you grow from those experiences, and I’m glad that you did. I really like that about you, it takes courage to open up about something like that when you first meet someone. I remember Bastille Days, and how we had our first “argument” there. When you wanted to kiss me in front of those protesters, I really wanted to, and I regret that we didn’t. I remember that day when you invited me to your sisters birthday, you asked me to do something cute with you after. I can’t even explain how that little comment made me feel so good inside. I like when we have good moments like these. It was great to hangout with your family, and meet the people you hold close to you. That time I met your aunt in the hospital was really great too. I’ve never been around a family that is so close as you are, and it makes me happy. I’m sorry that sometimes the comments I make come out the wrong way. I’m very sarcastic, and I do mean the best intentions out of them. I wish you could see that. That night it was raining out, and you said you wish you were laying with me in the rain, and how you thought that sounded so cheesy, I wish you would’ve seen the smile on my face. It’s little comments like that, that really made me infatuated with you. I liked waking up in the morning to a text message from you saying something about your work, when you asked how my day was. You can be the biggest sweetheart ever, and I can’t express that enough. I don’t know if it’s me, if you’re over it, or if you need some space, I just wish you would tell me. I fully believe we could be something great if you wanted it to happen. Like I said when we sat down at the lake where we first met, people that genuinely like each other should be able to discuss problems with they arise, not avoid them. When I asked you that night right before we went to volleyball where things are going, and you said you wanted to keep working it out, I had a smile, and I didn’t want you to see it, but I did, and I felt overjoyed at another chance. Since then, it’s been a roller coaster, and I just don’t know what to do anymore. I’m trying so hard, and sometimes I feel like I have to impress more than just you, and that is difficult. I wish you could see and feel how much I feel about you. Words can only say so much, but my actions speak louder. I really like all the great times that we’ve spent these last three months, and I wouldn’t change a thing about it, maybe just my attitude for certain things, but taking the risk to come out and see you, was definitely worth it. I’ve never been in a position like this, which is maybe why I keep writing so much about you. I need a place to vent so to say, even though I know few will see this, I’m okay with just writing freely about this. Maybe I’ll show this to you, but seeing where we’re at now, I doubt that’ll change a thing. I feel like the distance is growing, and that you don’t care. I havent heard from you all day, and it really sucks. That night you told me you want something that lasts, so do I. I really enjoyed that talk by the way. I’m glad we got to clear the air a little before camping. I do hate arguing with you, I really really do. I don’t want to push you away, but sometimes I feel you’re pushing me away. I don’t know why. I just wish you would let me know. I like you so much that I can see where I’m acting crazy sometimes. I do it because I care. I wouldn’t put so much effort in trying to fix things with you if I didn’t care so much. I’ve never been like this with any other guy that I’ve dated out there. You’re so different from the rest that it’s such a fresh breath of air, something that I’ve needed in a long time. I just wish you’d talk to me like you used to. If anything, I would love to just hear from you. You’re the only person that I think about lately, and it kills me inside to think that you don’t care. I miss you, and that is all. I’m giving you the space that I feel you need, but I will always be here, and I hope you can see that. I hope you’re not giving up on me. I never gave up on you.